UNBREADED: Why Can't I Commit to Dieting?

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Why Can't I Commit to Dieting?

I've stopped weighing myself. I don't think I'm losing any weight, and I don't want to know about it, because I'm plenty happy casually low-carbing and feeling the improvements in my energy level, my joints, and my skin. The problem is that I ultimately do have a goal of losing weight, and it's upsetting to me that I can't commit to it.

I can't commit.

Two weeks ago, it was my birthday. Last week, it was my boyfriend's birthday. This week, it's a trip to Ohio to see Tracey and my family. Next week, it's Halloween. Then it's Thanksgiving and Christmas and New Year's Eve. There's just plain never a good time to get serious, because I already have cheats planned.

In theory, low-carbing is so easy. Especially with a plan like the Belly Fat Cure, where I can eat as many as 120 carbs per day, 40 carbs at a time, and 15 grams of sugar. That's a LOT. Back when I was doing the Induction phase of Atkins a couple of years ago, I was so serious. The carbiest thing I allowed myself was a sprinkling of carrot on my salad. When my office had weekly birthday celebrations, I'd cut the cake for everyone else and then walk back to my desk if I felt myself being tempted. At restaurants, I'd alter my meals significantly to cut carbs, not thinking a thing of asking for grilled instead of fried chicken or broccoli instead of pasta. Now, I use eating out as an excuse to dip into the bread basket.

The fact that it seems like everyone else has no problem sticking to their low-carb plans makes it much worse. I know that the Belly Fat Cure is working for lots of other people, and I know it'd work for me if I was just willing to put in the work for more than 5 days at a time. The creator of the diet, Jorge Cruise, even offers easy meal ideas from well-known fast food joints that I have access to. Yet when my boyfriend and I were craving Taco Bell on Sunday morning, instead of getting the three hard-shelled tacos Jorge suggested, I went for the XXL Chalupa (which has 50+ carbs) just because I told myself I was off the diet for the weekend and wanted to try the thing.

I'm concerned that even if I get more serious, I'm still going to need to cheat when my boyfriend and I go out to dinner and I review our meal for my food blog. But I know it's self-defeating to say, "I'm not going to even bother trying to commit as much as I can if I can't commit 100%," because even a little bit of low-carb eating goes a long way toward health.

I just want to be able to announce to the world that I'm changing my life and suddenly have all of my temptations go away. I don't want to live in a world where I can't have a chalupa, but I don't want to live in a world where I'm overweight, either.

How do I decide which is more important?

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Carbzilla · 754 weeks ago

I hear ya. I'm right there with you. When I don't plan to stay on plan (which has been for months on end now) the world is full of carbs, and I'm eating them.

I'm calling it a plateau as my weight has not gone up, but I am frustrated with myself that I don't have more discipline, that I must not want it bad enough.

I can only think that we need to find something to truly motivate us. I want more functional fitness. I want to try more recipes. I want to be back in my size 8 jeans!

I think it's natural to rebel, but at some point you're going to have to decide what you want MOST.

:)

2 replies · active 753 weeks ago

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plumpdumpling 64p · 754 weeks ago

I think the "planning to stay on plan" is probably more important for me than I realized until you pointed it out. When I was Atkinsing and seeing great successes, it was because I just plain didn't allow myself to cheat. I didn't ever touch the bread basket at restaurants, and I actually ate things like salad even when there was homemade pasta on the menu. I remember scraping the cheese off of pizza and actually feeling bad that a little marinara remained.

I need to get to a place where I'm saying, "My boyfriend's taking me out this weekend for a meal I plan to review, but that's going to be my ONLY cheat meal of the week." And not buy ice cream on the way home just because I know my blood sugar's already up.

I realize that a low-carb diet is as close as I'm going to get to being able to eat seriously delicious food and still lose weight. Buttered Brussels sprouts, bunless burgers, and cheesy everything HAVE to be enough of a trade for size 8 jeans.

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Carbzilla · 753 weeks ago

You already know you can do this based on having done it before. Dig deep! I will too!

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Minichick · 754 weeks ago

I replied on Rosalie's blog about this very thing today. www.purplerosy.blogspot.com

It can be hard, but don't forget that it's not totally an all or nothing type of thing. If you really want to see what something tastes like that is not the greatest food choice, eat one or two bites so that you can taste it and then finish your meal with something that is good for you. I do this a lot. I'll ask my husband or kids if I can have a bite or two of something they're eating if it looks good, but know that I should not have more than that. This allows me to have a taste but not the ability to finish it off because, well, it's not my meal to finish. :) Sometimes is just a matter of finding tricks like this that work for you in various susceptible situations. Start collecting a bag of tricks that work for you.

Minichick

3 replies · active 754 weeks ago

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plumpdumpling 64p · 754 weeks ago

The funny thing is that I ALWAYS say that to Tracey. I'm like, "We can have anything as long as we only have a few bites!" And she always says that's too hard, and I always call her a pansy. But it really is great advice that I should actually follow. Maybe I need to make myself a set of rules to stick to.

What did you mean in your comment to Rosalie about your blog not working out?

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Minichick · 754 weeks ago

Well, if someone really does have such a hard time with one or two bites, they're probably right about that for themselves and need to figure out something else that works for them. I do know some who follow the "not even one bite" rule because they swear that they react to food like an alcoholic, who, once dry, cannot even have one sip of alcohol. Just the same, they do not take even one bite of food that they know is a trigger for them. It all comes down to figuring out what work for you. I do good with the couple of bites rule, so that's what I do. So, if you are going to have rules, or a "bag of tricks" as I like to say, then just make sure that they work for you, not make life miserable for you.

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Minichick · 754 weeks ago

Essentially, my blog did not work because it was private. I invited people I was comfortable with, or had a connection with, to join. A handful of people accepted my invitation, and of those that did join only one consistantly checked my blog and commented. I had a few others comment a couple of times, but not on a regular basis. I started the blog so that I could get extra support but it wasn't working out that way. The one girl who did comment regularly I see on other blogs, so ending my blog would not end the support I was already getting from her anyhow. In the end, it just felt like my effort wasn't worth the time to keep the blog going. I don't blame anyone, nor am I upset with any of my followers, I guess it's just easy to forget about a private blog vs. a public blog that is on your blogroll. That's okay.

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Ryan · 754 weeks ago

As much as it sucks, I think we have to get to the mindset that food itself is not entertainment. At least that's what I think when I am eating with Noel and she is eating delicious sugary treats.

Also, I have a personal rule about not refusing hospitality. So if I am at someone's house, I will eat whatever they give me. This is about the only cheat I will allow myself. This lead to some delicious naan last week. :-)

2 replies · active 754 weeks ago

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plumpdumpling 64p · 754 weeks ago

I was wondering specifically about you and if you cheat at all, so that's interesting. You guys don't really have a lot of places to eat out down there, right? I'm dying to meet someone else who eats 99% of his or her meals out of the house and doesn't cheat.

But yeah, you're right–Tracey and I have based a lot of our relationship on enjoying the same foods and eating while doing everything. We really, really enable each other. Kamran and I do, too, really. So I really admire that you can ignore Noel. Maybe I need to train myself to look down on people with weak wills who eat sugar.

I wonder what entertaining thing I can replace food with. NOT EXERCISE.

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Tracey · 754 weeks ago

The food-as-entertainment thing is a huge struggle for me. I just don't even really know how to be social without it, and it's especially hard when the person or people I'm with are eating poorly -- or even just differently from me.

I really do feel like Katie and I were able to make LOW CARB food into entertainment the last time she visited. We cooked together, tried new recipes, and kept each other on track for all but a couple of planned cheats. But the fact that we're going to the Pumpkin Show this weekend is making us both feel like there's no point in eating anything low carb while she's here. (I realize the faulty logic in the "if you're going to mess up a little anyway, you might as well go all out" mentality, but sometimes it's hard to avoid.)

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eperdu 2p · 754 weeks ago

I too struggle with this. I have learned over time to shoot for 80% of my day being foods that I consider healthy. I like to stay away from gluten/wheat not necessarily carbs. This means that an OK food for me is the rice krispie bars at Starbucks -- because it's a better choice than the brownie. That said, if 80% of the food that I put in is on my "good" list the remaining 20% is still OK even if it's not ideal. For example, if I have a good protein based breakfast (say an egg, cheese, and ham omelet), and then a lunch of salad with protein then dinner can have a piece of bread with my protein and veggies. Or it could be the tortilla in a quesadilla, pasta in a meat base sauce, etc. There are many days when I have 100% "compliance" with my eating because I'm not worried about it. I don't stress over it. I know for myself the more I say I can't have something the more I want it. If I tell myself I can have it then I don't want it as much. I still want it, but I'm able to moderate it a bit more.

Another thing for me is teaching myself that no food is truly bad. We can assign labels all we want but all food breaks down to the same base components: fat, protein, carbohydrate, etc. It's all the same stuff. Broccoli isn't righteous and haagen-daz isn't a sin. They are all the same thing - what IS different is how they make me feel. If I want to have energy and feel good consistently then I know that a diet of sugar isn't going to work. But some sugar is OK. If I label a food bad or good, then I'm also labeling myself as good or bad. I don't have time to beat myself up if I choose a snickers & doritos for dinner instead of protein and veg. I have better things in my life to do!

It's about paying attention and being aware of yourself and not going on auto-pilot. If you are on auto-pilot you cease to be aware of what is going on and that is the path to being unhappy in the end.

Be kind to yourself too. You are un-learning a life of habits.

2 replies · active 754 weeks ago

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Ryan Cordle · 754 weeks ago

Of course no food is inherently sinful or something, but remember there are kinds of fats, carbohydrates and proteins. They are not all identical, and how our body responds to them is not the same.

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eperdu 2p · 754 weeks ago

Right, that's why I said "the difference is how they make me feel". If I'm truly on the ball with eating I follow a Primal or Paleo lifestyle for the ultimate in feel good living.

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carrolch 6p · 754 weeks ago

For me, the commitment is not to dieting but to health. It took me a long time to change my perception and mindset. Once I realized that my true objective is to live a healthy life and be around for as long as I can to enjoy my family, it changed my decision making process. A brownie made with sugar and wheat wasn't preventing me from eating it because it had too many calories or carbs, but because it would damage my insides.

I agree with eperdu. 80/20 is a good rule to follow and if you eat pizza or chalupas one weekend, it's not the end of the world. You are on the right track.

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Grace2882 · 754 weeks ago

I am sorry that you are struggling. I know that you won't believe me but I have a low carb recipe for chalupas that I made on Sunday that will be on my blog next week. It was very good and only 7 carbs each. ____Now back to trying to stay on task on the diet. I have found that if I eat something that spikes my glucose that the next day I crave food the entire day and have to really struggle not to eat the entire day. I can't say that I allow myself to cheat but there are things that are supposed to be low carb but I have a spike in glucose anyway and realize that I just can't eat that item. ____I have found many restaurants that I can go to and maintain my low carb status. The trick is not choosing a restaurant that has a drivethru window. I can't think of any of those restaurants that offer what I need. Applebees, cracker barrel, bob evans, TGI Fridays, red lobster and Jimmy Johns all have low carb options and will substitute items to make other dishes on the menu low carb. ____

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Grace2882 · 754 weeks ago

For instance, yesterday before we went to the ziplines Mike and I stopped at Bob Evans. I got the southwestern 3 egg omelet but had them keep the hollandaise sauce off from it. I substituted a slice of wheat bread and sugar free jelly for the biscuit and had them replace the home fries for fresh fruit. I could only eat the fresh pineapple from the fruit because after using my glucometer I have learned that fresh pineapple doesn't spike me. ____I am already trying new recipes to make for the holidays so that I won't be caught staring at my family while they are eating their high carb item and I am left with only turkey and green beans. I plan to have low carb stuffing, pumpkin cheese cake and butternut squash with my turkey and green beans. ____I wish that I lived closer to offer you more support.

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Emily · 754 weeks ago

I've been doing my own variation of low-carb for two months and have lost 22 pounds, so I'm pretty happy with it. Up til now I've been pretty good about staying on program, but have cheated maybe once a week out to dinner (although no bread!) Lately I've been cheating more frequently but I'm trying to be patient because for me, this really has to be a lifestyle or else it will all come back. One thing that is helping me is that even as I try to keep everything low-carb, I also am trying to be aware of how many points I'm eating a day (Weight Watchers points - I've done off and on over the years) so even if I cheat on the carbs, I'm still limiting the amount. Either way I have to lose, right??

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Mrs. Bachelor Girl · 753 weeks ago

I hopped off the wagon the week of my wedding, and getting back on has been an ever-loving NIGHTMARE. I have never craved sugar so bad in my LIFE. I've also been headache-y and just generally kind of ill.

The good part is it's made me even more committed to generally staying on plan during the honeymoon. I'm going to enjoy myself, sure, but I'm not going to go completely crazy the way I did last week.

1 reply · active 753 weeks ago

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Tracey · 753 weeks ago

Aren't sugar cravings AMAZING?! Not in a good way of course, but in that they're really interesting. I could never really identify what that feeling was before I went low-carb and could finally tell the difference between feeling good and living in a sugar-induced fog.

If you can get back on track that quickly after going crazy, your body will really thank you for it. I'm dealing with the aftermath of taking most of my whole first year of marriage "off" from caring about what I eat. It was fun, for sure, but I'm hoping it will be more fun to get all that energy back.

UNBREADED

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Why Can't I Commit to Dieting?

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